Suburban Dads

Patiently waiting until it is our turn to speak at the P.T.A. meeting

We passionately read our manifesto out loud at the P.T.A. meeting

No one showed much support for our manifesto at the P.T.A. meeting so we quietly sat back down

We filled a riding mower with nitrous oxide... it just broke.

We hate your novelty mailbox. It is not clever. It fills us with hate.

We're not converting the garage into anything, we just like to sit here quietly in lawn chairs alone.

possum vs. opossum

Weed killer can be used to create little dead grass crop circles in your yard

How did the ice cream trucker driver get that job? Does he own that truck?

The neighbor's cat killed a bunny in front of the neighborhood kids. They're all crying now and all we can think to do is yell "YOU'RE EITHER A BUNNY OR A CAT IN THIS WORLD!!" at them from the window.